Have you guys seen this one yet? - "Somali Cruise Package"

00fxd

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Location
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Somali Cruise Package


I found a Somali cruise package that departs from Sawakin
(in the Sudan) and docks at Bagamoya (in Tanzania). The cost is a bit
high @ US$800 per person double occupancy but I didn't find that
offensive. What I found enticing is that the cruise company is encouraging people
to bring their 'High powered weapons' along on the cruise. If you don't
have weapons you can rent them right there on the boat. They claim to have a master
gunsmith on board and will have reloading parties every afternoon. The cruise
lasts from 4-8 days and nights and costs a maximum of $3200 per person double
occupancy (4 days). All the boat does is sail up and down the coast of Somalia
waiting to get hijacked by pirates. Here are some of the costs and claims
associated with the package.


$800.00 US/per day double occupancy (4 day max
billing)




M-16 full auto rental $25.00/day ammo at 100 rounds of 5.56
armor piercing ammo
at 15.95



Ak-47 riffle @ No charge. 100 rounds of 7.62 com
block ball ammo at 14.95




Barrett M-107 .50 cal sniper rifle rental 55.00/day.
Ammo at $4.95 per
round .50 cal armor piercing.



Crew members can double as spotters for 30.00 per hour
(spotting scope
included).



They even offer RPGs at 75 bucks and $200 or 3 standard
loads



"Everyone gets use of complimentary night vision
equipment plus coffee and
snacks on the top deck from 7pm-6am."



Meals are not included but seem reasonable.



Most cruises offer a mini-bar... but we go one better with
our"Mini-GUN available @ 450.00 per 30 seconds of
sustained fire."

Sign my ass up! "FUN FOR THE WHOLE
FAMILY"

They even offer a partial money back guarantee if not
satisfied.

"We guarantee that you will experience at least two
hijacking attempts by
pirates or we will refund back half your money including
gun rental charges and
any unused ammo (mini gun charges not included). How can we
guarantee you will
experience a hijacking? We operate at 5 knots within 12
miles of the coast of
Somalia. If an attempted Hijacking does not occur we
will turn the boat
around and cruise by at 4 knots. We will repeat this for up
to 8 days making
three passes a day along the entire length of Somalia.
At night the boat
is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot off at intervals
and loud disco music
beamed shore side to attract attention. Cabin space is
limited so respond
quickly. Reserve your package before May 15 and get 100
rounds of free tracer
ammo in the caliber of your choice."

TESTIMONIALS!

"I got three confirmed kills on my last trip.
I'll never hunt big game
in Africa again. I felt like the Komandant in
Schindler's list!"----
Lars, Hamburg Germany

"Six attacks in 4 days was more than I expected. I
bagged three pirates
and my 12 yr old son sank two rowboats with the minigun.
PIRATES 0 -PASSENGERS-32!
Well worth the trip. Just make sure your spotter
speaks English"
---- Ned, Salt Lake city, Utah USA

"I haven't had this much fun since flying
choppers in NAM. Don't worry
about getting shot by pirates as they never even got close
to the ship with
those weapons they use, and their shitty aim reminds me of
a drunken 'juicer'
door gunner we picked up from the motor pool back in
Nam!"
----"Chopper' Dan, Toledo USA.

"Like ducks in a barrel. They turned the ship
around and we saw
them bleed and cry in the water like little girls. Saw
one wounded pirate
eaten by sharks--what a laugh riot!! This is a must do
adventure!" ---
Zeke-Minnahaw Springs Kentucky USA
 
I just got another on......

A Little 10-year-old girl was walking home,
alone, from school one day, when a big man on a black
motorcycle pulls up beside her. After following along for a while, turns
to her
and asks, "Hey there little girl, do you want to go for a ride?"

"NO!" says the little girl as she keeps on walking.

The motorcyclist again pulls up beside her and asks,
"Hey little girl, I will give you $10 if you hop on the back."

"NO!" says the little girl as she hurries down the street.

The motorcyclist pulls up beside the little girl again and says,
"Okay kid, my last offer! I'll give you 20 Bucks "and" a Big Bag of Candy
if you will just hop on the back of my bike and we will go
for a ride."

Finally, the little girl stops and turns towards him and Screams Out...

"Look Dad" "You're the one who bought the Honda instead of the Harley"!

"YOU RIDE IT!"
 
Somali Cruise Package


I found a Somali cruise package that departs from Sawakin
(in the Sudan) and docks at Bagamoya (in Tanzania). The cost is a bit
high @ US$800 per person double occupancy but I didn't find that
offensive. What I found enticing is that the cruise company is encouraging people
to bring their 'High powered weapons' along on the cruise. If you don't
have weapons you can rent them right there on the boat. They claim to have a master
gunsmith on board and will have reloading parties every afternoon. The cruise
lasts from 4-8 days and nights and costs a maximum of $3200 per person double
occupancy (4 days). All the boat does is sail up and down the coast of Somalia
waiting to get hijacked by pirates. Here are some of the costs and claims
associated with the package.


$800.00 US/per day double occupancy (4 day max
billing)




M-16 full auto rental $25.00/day ammo at 100 rounds of 5.56
armor piercing ammo
at 15.95



Ak-47 riffle @ No charge. 100 rounds of 7.62 com
block ball ammo at 14.95




Barrett M-107 .50 cal sniper rifle rental 55.00/day.
Ammo at $4.95 per
round .50 cal armor piercing.



Crew members can double as spotters for 30.00 per hour
(spotting scope
included).



They even offer RPGs at 75 bucks and $200 or 3 standard
loads



"Everyone gets use of complimentary night vision
equipment plus coffee and
snacks on the top deck from 7pm-6am."



Meals are not included but seem reasonable.



Most cruises offer a mini-bar... but we go one better with
our"Mini-GUN available @ 450.00 per 30 seconds of
sustained fire."

Sign my ass up! "FUN FOR THE WHOLE
FAMILY"

They even offer a partial money back guarantee if not
satisfied.

"We guarantee that you will experience at least two
hijacking attempts by
pirates or we will refund back half your money including
gun rental charges and
any unused ammo (mini gun charges not included). How can we
guarantee you will
experience a hijacking? We operate at 5 knots within 12
miles of the coast of
Somalia. If an attempted Hijacking does not occur we
will turn the boat
around and cruise by at 4 knots. We will repeat this for up
to 8 days making
three passes a day along the entire length of Somalia.
At night the boat
is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot off at intervals
and loud disco music
beamed shore side to attract attention. Cabin space is
limited so respond
quickly. Reserve your package before May 15 and get 100
rounds of free tracer
ammo in the caliber of your choice."

TESTIMONIALS!

"I got three confirmed kills on my last trip.
I'll never hunt big game
in Africa again. I felt like the Komandant in
Schindler's list!"----
Lars, Hamburg Germany

"Six attacks in 4 days was more than I expected. I
bagged three pirates
and my 12 yr old son sank two rowboats with the minigun.
PIRATES 0 -PASSENGERS-32!
Well worth the trip. Just make sure your spotter
speaks English"
---- Ned, Salt Lake city, Utah USA

"I haven't had this much fun since flying
choppers in NAM. Don't worry
about getting shot by pirates as they never even got close
to the ship with
those weapons they use, and their shitty aim reminds me of
a drunken 'juicer'
door gunner we picked up from the motor pool back in
Nam!"
----"Chopper' Dan, Toledo USA.

"Like ducks in a barrel. They turned the ship
around and we saw
them bleed and cry in the water like little girls. Saw
one wounded pirate
eaten by sharks--what a laugh riot!! This is a must do
adventure!" ---
Zeke-Minnahaw Springs Kentucky USA

Can you forward me the contact details please? I've been racking my brains on where to go for my next vacation :lol:
 
Wayne could bring his sweet wife in a bikini to attract 'em

I'm in :drink: Beer,Waynes wife (you can come to Wayne) and live moving targets.It don't get no better than that.

That does sound pretty good Kev :thumbs:

I knocked up a pseudo web page for that cruise so I could print it out and take it to work for a laugh, but it's in Word format and I don't know how to post it up...

Any suggestions?
 
Last year, I went on the Norwegian baby seal clubbing tour. Did any of you guys do that one..? It was a smash!!:smash: This year, it's Somalia Cruises, fer shure - I didn't think anything would beat clubbing seals, but using automatic weapons to pop pirates in rubber boats sounds like a blast. Do they have duct tape on the cruise so I can tape my AK-47 clips together, or should I tape my clips before I leave home? I don't want the tape to get old and sticky from heat and humidity, thus staining my 30-round, Obama-banned clips. Any tech advice on avoiding duct tape stains on my clips would be appreciated.
Lars
 
Last year, I went on the Norwegian baby seal clubbing tour. Did any of you guys do that one..? It was a smash!!:smash: T
Lars
We have baby seal clubing on the left coast of Canada too. I've been dying to gat out there and give that a whirl..........
 
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